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Sounds like a big part of the reason he's still such a mess is because he's always had someone to bail him out and cover for him. First you and your parents and then his wife. Watching someone self-destruct can be a horribly painful experience, especially knowing that they could easily wind up dead. The thing people have to keep reminding themselves of is that they cannot stop the inevitable from happening no matter how many times they catch the person when they fall. When someone is so far gone, they have to hit absolute rock bottom and it's something they either find the strength to come back from on their own or not. You need to be there for your parents right now and present a united front, otherwise he's going to wreck their lives again too. I don't think his 17 year old mentality is necessarily because of the drugs. It may have a lot more to do with the fact nobody's ever made him grow up.
In other words, what Ash said. haha
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