Walgreens is like carbon monoxide

[Dionysos]

I dropped by the local Walgreens to pick up a couple of prescriptions I'm loading up on(valtrex, chantix, an HIV cocktail or two) prior to getting laid off in a couple of weeks. She pulled the script bags, typed into their computer terminal, and I was subsequently told that they didn't have the right info on my insurance and the claims wouldn't process. I knew this was due to our membership IDs changing at my insurance mafi-I mean company, so I got the insurance mafia on the phone and started to sort out my new ID. By 'started to sort out', I mean sat on hold for 15 minutes while the Mumbai call center played russian roulette with my phone call. After getting that done and handing the Walgreens staff my membership ID, they said they'd re-run the scripts and get them filled. Since I saw that the bags were already filled, I figured this was just a paperwork thing and that they'd be done in a couple of minutes.

I was wrong.

As I sat there for the next hour, playing sudoku on my phone to pass the time, I came to realize something. Walgreens was trying to slowly crush my soul. It wasn't an overt attempt like sales douches at work do, attacking me from all sides with insipid questions designed to balance on the line between fucking a customer and outright fraud. No, this was subtle. While you sit there in a seat waiting, they play music in the background. Old music. Bad, old music. Doo-wop from the 50s that sings about how much they miss their girlfriend or 70s soft rock that pines for a dead lover emanates from the background. The fluorescent lighting and soft clatter of pharmacy techs quietly explaining to octogenarians that Cigna just decided they need to pay for their own god damn heart meds combines with the aural valium to whisper in your ear: 'submit'. Just go ahead and lay back. Take a 5 minute ride on this 3 year old chair massage pad, listen to the music, and just let go. You don't need to wake up if you don't want to, because it doesn't matter. Chances are, you're here because you're fending off death anyway. So go ahead, take a 'nap'. We'll call 911 eventually. In the meantime, we're going to take our sweet fucking time filling your prescription because you were too dumb to setup mail order.

About 75 minutes and 3 attempts at slitting my wrists with the pen attached to the credit card reader later, they had my prescriptions filled. Well, one of them was filled. The other they wouldn't do 90 days on because I was too fucking dumb to do mail order like my insurance wants. So I got that one for 30 days, which puts me only a mere 60 days short of the normal no-insurance period at a regular job. Great success.

Don't ask me how my trip to Kroger went.

[Sinacle]

so how did your trip to kroger go?