The truth on sex (well maybe) - Dallas Dance Music - Dallas nightlife, music, tickets, and more

The House Rocka · 07-02-09, 01:24 PM

1. When I was born, I was given a choice - a big dick or a good memory....I don't remember what I chose.

2. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory.

3. A wife is a sex object. Every time you ask for sex, she objects.

4. Impotence: nature' s way of saying, "No hard feelings..."

5. There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men - 'don't' and 'stop', unless they are used together.

6. Panties: not the best thing on earth, but next to the best thing on earth.

7. There are three stages in a man's life: Tri-Weekly, Try Weekly and Try Weakly.

8. Virginity can be cured.

9. Virginity is not dignity, it's lack of opportunity.

10. Having sex is like playing bridge - if you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand.

11. I tried phone sex once, but the holes in the dialer were too small.

12. Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy.

13. Question: What's an Australian kiss?
Answer: The same thing as a French kiss, only down under.

14. A couple just married were happy with the whole thing. He was happy with the Hole and she was happy with the Thing.

15. Question: What are the three biggest tragedies in a man's life?
Answer: Life sucks, job sucks and the wife doesn't.

16. Question: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Answer: Breasts don't have eyes.

17. Despite the old saying, 'Don't take your troubles to bed', many men still sleep with their wives!

GLopez · 07-02-09, 01:31 PM

Why didn't anyone want to see RHS???

He was throwing down illmatic mad trickery on the wheels of steel and that was the sickest set I'v seen since living in da OC, son!

Word to your mother!!!

progress · 07-02-09, 01:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GLopez

Why didn't anyone want to see RHS???

He was throwing down illmatic mad trickery on the wheels of steel and that was the sickest set I'v seen since living in da OC, son!

Word to your mother!!!

That might have been funny had you got the abbreviation right.....

GLopez · 07-02-09, 05:22 PM

lol

deepness · 07-02-09, 07:11 PM

i dont see what's so funny w/ not wantin 2 see RHCP?

dAnicA_dNbgUrL · 07-02-09, 07:58 PM

12. Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy.
That's fuckin funny..

Sinacle · 07-03-09, 12:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dAnicA_dNbgUrL

12. Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy.
That's fuckin funny..

and true unless of course your a necropheliac

zymote · 07-03-09, 12:56 AM

The House Rocka · 07-03-09, 03:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by progress

That might have been funny had you got the abbreviation right.....

Not only did he not get the abbreviation right but also, RHV doesnt spin off wheels of steel. He spins off wheels of plastic.

07-02-09, 01:24 PM	#1 (permalink)
The House Rocka Join Date: Feb 2009 Posts: 1,009	The truth on sex (well maybe) 1. When I was born, I was given a choice - a big dick or a good memory....I don't remember what I chose. 2. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. 3. A wife is a sex object. Every time you ask for sex, she objects. 4. Impotence: nature' s way of saying, "No hard feelings..." 5. There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men - 'don't' and 'stop', unless they are used together. 6. Panties: not the best thing on earth, but next to the best thing on earth. 7. There are three stages in a man's life: Tri-Weekly, Try Weekly and Try Weakly. 8. Virginity can be cured. 9. Virginity is not dignity, it's lack of opportunity. 10. Having sex is like playing bridge - if you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand. 11. I tried phone sex once, but the holes in the dialer were too small. 12. Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy. 13. Question: What's an Australian kiss? Answer: The same thing as a French kiss, only down under. 14. A couple just married were happy with the whole thing. He was happy with the Hole and she was happy with the Thing. 15. Question: What are the three biggest tragedies in a man's life? Answer: Life sucks, job sucks and the wife doesn't. 16. Question: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Answer: Breasts don't have eyes. 17. Despite the old saying, 'Don't take your troubles to bed', many men still sleep with their wives!

07-02-09, 01:31 PM	#2 (permalink)
GLopez Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 11,433	Re: The truth on sex (well maybe) Why didn't anyone want to see RHS??? He was throwing down illmatic mad trickery on the wheels of steel and that was the sickest set I'v seen since living in da OC, son! Word to your mother!!! __________________ I'm just going for the music..

07-02-09, 05:22 PM	#4 (permalink)
GLopez Join Date: Jan 2004 Posts: 11,433	Re: The truth on sex (well maybe) lol __________________ I'm just going for the music..

07-02-09, 07:11 PM	#5 (permalink)
deepness Join Date: Nov 2003 Posts: 1,620	Re: The truth on sex (well maybe) i dont see what's so funny w/ not wantin 2 see RHCP?

07-02-09, 07:58 PM	#6 (permalink)
dAnicA_dNbgUrL Join Date: May 2004 Location: Far out there maaan... Posts: 1,293	Re: The truth on sex (well maybe) 12. Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy. That's fuckin funny.. __________________ Y ándale... Pero si vieras Como son lindas estas borracheras Y ándale...

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07-03-09, 12:56 AM	#8 (permalink)
zymote Yes We Did! Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: ATX Posts: 5,249	Re: The truth on sex (well maybe) __________________ Zenergy Events ___________________________________________ Parties I'm Attending: 9.18.09 - Wonk - FMP - Club Mixx - ATX 9.25 - 9.27 - Underground Roots - Tribal Elements - Guadalupe River 11.28.09 - Mega Buzz - Massive Intent - Travis County Expo Center - ATX 12.31.09 - Twice In A Blue Moon - Massive Intent - Travis County Expo Center - ATX

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